Friday, September 19, 2008

The Seventh Step

I don’t remember what I did before I met you. The days are sort of blurry. I went to school, I worked, I partied like there is no tomorrow on the weekends, but I cannot quite remember any specific details. It is all in black and white. Sort of.

You and I were married twice. To each other. Once in the US, a couple of months later in India. It was not planned so. I always had wanted a small wedding. I did not even really want a Vedic ceremony. So many of its rituals seem to have lost their context. I would have been happy signing the register and celebrating it with close family and friends, but you believed in the sanctity and purity of fire and wanted us to be married the Vedic way for that, if not anything else. And I decided not to press my point. Did it really matter how we were married? A grueling six hour ceremony, many saree changes and many untranslated chants? So be it.

But I must have wished really hard for a small ceremony. Because, soon after our engagement as my full-of-lawyers family began to enquire into where the marriage would be registered, it became apparent that it would be easier to just get it done here before we left for India. We went to the county court and got our license. I came back home and looked up a Justice of Peace and booked her for Sept.20. at 9:30 a.m. I wore turquoise Dharmavaram, the only saree I had with me. You wore a business suit. And thus we were married. No rings exchanged because, the wedding bands were already ordered for in India. The two of us and three friends as witnesses. A lot of our friends did not even know this, since it was so sudden. A close friend brought a chocolate cake to celebrate and the “reception” was held at a place dear to our hearts - a Starbucks shop - over slices of rich chocolate cake and lattes.

The funny part of our wedding was this. Our friends had decided to throw us a bachelor/bachelorette bash the next day (which was a Saturday). This had been planned for many weeks and a big junta was invited. So imagine the surprise (and I suspect the letdown) most of our friends had when we announced that we had been married by the justice of peace, the day before.

It will be six years tomorrow since that early autumn day in a county court. I look upon that day and see it as a day when we loved each other the least. For, even though our love changed and took on many different avatars, it never ceased to grow. While most husbands and wives go out for dinner or a movie on their anniversaries, or plan a trip to the beach or the mountains, we celebrated our anniversary last year at the cardiac recovery unit. You had a stent put in your heart that very same morning. The irony of that day never ceases to stun me.

But as we step into our seventh year, I hope the worst is behind us. And while I have wanted diamonds or flowers or gadgets on our anniversary before, I ask for nothing more than your health and companionship and our unity.

Happy Anniversary, love.

52 comments:

PG said...

Oh! what a lovely post! Wish you three health, happiness and all the Best! Congratulations !

K 3 said...

Happy Anniversary, Dottie and Geek! Here's to many more years of happiness and togetherness!

Tania said...

Happy Anniversary , Dottie and Mr.Dottie.Very pretty post,very Dottish. :)

Anonymous said...

Very nice post. Happy Anniversary to you both. Funny but our wedding was also on the similar lines....
-Nithu

Altoid said...

Happy Anniversary wishes to you and BG. Many you have many many more.

Enjoy the special weekend

-altoid

Shobana said...

Happy Anniversary Dottie!!!! 7 yrs...yoohoo!!!

Anonymous said...

Beautiful post... Regular Lurker here. De-lurked a few times though.

Here is wishing you guys a Happy Anniversary and many years of togetherness and joy ! :-)

-AG

Gauri said...

Happy Anniversary, Dottie and Big Geek !! :)

And here's to many many more :)

GettingThereNow said...

Happy Anniversary to two very sweet people!

Pssst!! BTW, have you heard of the seven year itch??

:D

Suki said...

Happy Anniversary, Dottie and BigGeek!

Fuzzylogic said...

Such a lovely post!Happy Anniversary to you and the Big Geek. I wish you both oodles of good health,love and happiness to last a lifetime and more.

Tharini said...

Very calming and you sent those ripple waves out through your post. A very happy anniversary to you dear Dottie and Big Geek. May the enrichment only grow!

choxbox said...

lovely post!

happy anniv dottie!

Vinita said...

Happy Anniversary. A very heartfelt post.

How our perspective on life and our priorities change after some thing big happens.

Love, mental peace and good health.(for every one)

Vinita

Squiggles Mom said...

At the end of it all, it is these simple things that matter the most. So true. Happy Anniversary!

RJ said...

Very happy anniversary to both of you. Wish you happiness and togetherness for years to come.Enjoy!!

The Soul of Alec Smart said...

Happy Anniversary!! I'm here after a long time, and found this beautiful post :) Hope you two had a great time.

Preethi said...

wow dottie.. that was a really touching dottie style post... Happy Anniversary to both of you!! Loved the starbucks reception {wink} I wanted a wedding like that myself.. but ended up having all the hoopla!!

its our space said...

Delurking after a long time to wish you and the BG a very happy anniversary. Here's to a hundred more years of health and happiness !!

Parul said...

Happy Anniv, Dottie...a great post to bring in the seventh year.

Mona said...

beatiful post, dottie. happy 7th, you two. here's wishing you guys togetherness, health and happiness and love, always.

~nm said...

Wishing you a very Happy Anniversary!

This was such a lovely post! Like always! Hope you stay as happy as you are..always!

Nikeeta Pande said...

Hi,
I saw your blog for the first time today and this is such a beautiful post!
Wish you a Very Happy Anniversary!

Nikeeta

Girl Next Door (gnd) said...

Happy anniversary, guys! A very Warm post. Our wedding had all of the showiness, considering my sisters S and U's weddings turned out really simple and in the US with most of the family unable to make it...

dipali said...

Lovely post. Some difficult times teach us what is really important in our lives. God bless you and your family with good health and many many many years of togetherness.

Preethi said...

Was inspired to make a post come read!!

Cuckoo said...

Touching. Wish you both many many wonderful healthy years ahead.

aargee said...

Nice post! Belated anniversary wishes!

DotThoughts said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
DotThoughts said...

Thank you all for your very warm wishes. We did go out for dinner that day and I did ask for a new couch (despite having been given an anniversary gift in advance) I guess old habits die hard :)

noon said...

Happy Anniversary Dottie! Lovely post! I wish you both good health and happiness always!

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Maggie said...

Hey Dottie, belated wishes! Here's to many, many more years of love and togetherness.

rayshma said...

aww... HOW did i miss this one!!
happy anniv, dottie!
what did u do? c'mon! out with details!!!

Neera said...

Belated wishes for a wonderful wonderful 7th year and a very happy and healthy life ahead!

Too beautiful, left me misty eyed. Really do hope the worst is behind such a wonderful couple.

Mama - Mia said...

very belated but earnest anniversary wishes!

here wishing you guys a lifetime of love, hope nad happiness! :)

cheers!

abha

Penguin said...

Happy anniversary, Dottie! I'm a regular lurker here, but this post inspired me to delurk - it was beautifully written :-)

I love Lucy said...

Hope you guys had a wonderful anniversary :)

Mystic Margarita said...

How in God's name did I miss this one? Happy Belated Anniversary, Dottie and Big Geek. Wishing you many many more years of love, laughter, health, and togetherness!

DotThoughts said...

Thank you all for the warm wishes! we did go out and eat at the Cheesecake Factory and well.. to be honest, I did ask for a new couch :)

Trishna said...

awwww this is beautiful...belated anniversary wishes.sorry i missed this post.

Pixie said...

Beautiful post Dottie... :?)

Happy Anniversary! (Wishes are late, but from the very bottom of my heart! :P)

Wish you and Geek many more such very happy anniversaries :)

DotThoughts said...

thanks trish and pixie!

Monika said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Monika said...

lovely post... full of warmth :) belated happy anniversary and wishing u all good health always

themunchkinblog said...

:)
Belated Happy Anniversary. Wishing you both a lifetime of health and happiness..

Sue said...

Late, but I wish you both health in the years to come. The happiness is there already.

love to you both,
Sue

karmickids said...

How lovely. Happy anniversary and may there be many more joyous lattes at Starbucks...

DotThoughts said...

thanks girls!!!

Rohini said...

Beautiful post. Loved your second wedding. Happy belated anniversary

Mayuri said...

Hey! Lovely post.....so very tender :)

Just Like That said...

awww.. .. wish you both many many years of happy, healthy companionship